Becoming Extinct in Full View of the Multitudes
In the beginning, you were afraid of forgetting. Afraid that you yourself would forget, afraid that others would forget you. And so, every morning you would speak, write, perform the rituals at your desk. You used your own voice to pursue your memories, trying to fill the growing emptiness inside. You seek a face, many faces, an utterance, a lot of talk that once lingered in your ears. Following the arteries of the wind, you walk a long way, then stop short when you discover that the face had disappeared a long time ago, and what you cradle carefully in your hands is nothing more than a piece of wood, not even worth being called a mask.
…
Eyes wide and mouth agape, you stare as this world slips by you day after day. You are becoming extinct in full view of the multitudes, and now you are truly afraid, afraid of remembering. Those whom you have forgotten or still remember, they have forgotten or still remember you too. Living or dead, they’re just two words roaming about, until a day comes when you can no longer remember~do you still remember you? Between you and your shadow, in that tiny space, dwell a multitude of lonely ghosts.
~Yang Lian
“Ghost Talk” (Tr. Charles A. Laughlin) ~ Running Wild: New Chinese Writers ~ Ed. David Der-Wei Wang & Jeanne Tai ~ NY : Columbia UP, 1994 / pgs 103-4
